About 5 years ago a group of 30 or so women and their 6 week old babies met in a room at our local Community Health Clinic. Over the weeks and months that followed, a number of the women left the group for various reasons (lack of interest, work commitments etc.). But a few remained. In fact, only 5 remained.
5 strong minded women, with their first borns, struggling to make sense of this new chapter in their lives, together and alone. These 5 women are the Yummy Mummy's.
Nearly every week for the past 5 years I have been meeting with these chicks and their gorgeous children, and have been supporting, laughing, learning, crying, bitching and observing together. They have helped me more than I can ever thank them for and without them, I'd be lost. And I know they feel the same.
Together we've been through births, deaths, job losses, job gains, sickness, new teeth, lost teeth, daycare, preschool, prep, moving house, moving towns, rough patches and hilarious good times.
"Mummy's group" means different things to different people. To me, it means the weekly gathering (but constant support) with women who understand that you might not be looking your best, but you're doing just fine. You might have a handbag full of baby wipes and odd socks, but you're still that glamour puss at heart. You might spend the whole morning whinging about how hard things are, but you wouldn't change them for the world.
The mummy's listen. They care. They know what you're going though and either have advice, suggestions or some sort of mocking sarcasm to help you along.
To our husbands, "Mummy's group" is "the weekly coffee mornings she goes on", the secret society of stay at home mums who meet each week and talk about god knows what, "but it's probably about me".
To coffee shop owners "Mummy's group" are those women with their prams and noisy children who will tear the place apart, bring their own lunch boxes full of fruit and crackers and leave the rubbish behind. The women who will order coffee and get annoyed if the kitchen isn't open before 11.30am.
And to me, "Mummy's group" is sanity. It’s getting together with some great friends and surviving this life I chose. It's making sense of sleepless nights, defusing toddler tantrums and cheering as each new milestone is reached. It's a sense of relief knowing there are girls on hand who know what's going on, know my kids well enough to offer some time out and know how to kick up our heels and enjoy the rare Mummy's Night Out.
Mummy's group is also the one piece of advice I give to every pregnant woman I know. Find one with children the same age as yours and give it a good go. There is benefit in having a group of friends with children, but to have a group of friends with children the same age as yours; going through the same stages at the same time is just magical.
And why all this reminiscing about Mummy's? Well last week we saw the newest breed of Mummy's group. While out at our local play centre, enjoying a coffee and chat as our 3 year olds all played nicely together, a group of about 10 women walked in. 10 women with their prams and giant nappy bags filled to cover any situation, and their children who looked too small to get much benefit from the play centre. The new Mummy's group. At one stage one of our girls went and said hello to the new ladies. And through a brief conversation discovered they had all met recently at the same clinic we had, all those years ago.
So to you, new Mummy's group, I say enjoy the support you get, enjoy the love and enjoy the ride!
And to my Yummy Mummy's: Julia, Stella, Ronnie & Lou - thank you. For everything.
Do you have a mummy's group? Share the love and leave a comment!
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